Chasing Snakes
Scorpio New Moon & Mercury Retrograde
“Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die”
Picture this: a snake bites you. The venom is already in your veins, eating you alive. But instead of focusing on healing, you chase the snake. You’re running after it, demanding answers. Why me? You’re yelling at it, trying to prove you didn’t deserve it. You’re obsessed with understanding why it did what it did.
But here’s the hard truth—the longer you chase that snake, the faster the poison spreads. And while you’re out there hunting for closure, the venom is killing you. That’s exactly how holding onto resentment, anger, or pain works. Every second you spend trying to make sense of it or waiting for justice, it’s destroying you from the inside out.
You have two options:
1. Keep chasing the snake and let it finish the job.
2. Drop the chase, face the poison, and start healing yourself.
You don’t need closure to move forward. You don’t need the snake to explain itself. All you need is the courage to stop running and take your power back. The world is full of snakes. Don’t let one bite define you.
TW: This post discusses abuse
Other people’s hurtful behavior says more about them than about you… supposedly.
I believe it can say something about us both or at least how such behavior is handled. This saying has been a simplistic salve for those who struggle with objectivity and/or low self-esteem. It’s easy to eagerly assume a person’s poor treatment is A RESPONSE because IT IS, just now in REACTION mode. To question where this re: comes from and why IS a consideration for anyone of sound mind: did I do something to contribute to this dynamic? Sometimes we DO receive a response/reaction for our own behaviors, actions or lack thereof. Having self-awareness and showing up for deconstructing conflict is a part of accountability. To not auto-deflect, instead ponder one’s part in a problem, is a learning lesson about ourselves AND others.
However, obscured experiences of neglect, gas-lighting and other trickery where a blame game is in play triggers a deeper wound for those who were the scapegoat in a narcissistic family dynamic or grew up within parental alcohol/drug abuse. The unhealed inner child’s buried voice pipes in knowing it deserves better yet also clings to the wounded belief they are deserving of pain due to a fractured foundational past. It can go both ways: remain inquisitive (or at the very least stay calm) OR enough manipulation caves to the problematically-labeled “reactive abuse” a.k.a. self-defense. People who are unaccountable might DARVO to response/reaction even tho compared offenses do not match up… not at all.
Most of us have a need to be understood AND to understand others so as not to be confused about how and WHY a situation played out so negatively or to avoid that chaotic crescendo all together. And in this need we can be wrapped in toxicity, unable to be set free. We become enmeshed in not just emotional components but unhealed parts of ourselves craving recognition or a new outcome. We think that to be respected in full with the growth of reciprocity for both parties will fix us. It IS affirming but we are all little oceans of experience, simmering. Some people are so unaware of how their own lack of accountability is a strong-hold to a previous desperation of justice for another wound altogether that they become so stubborn in their cling to not apologizing (at all or in full). Been there, done that.
I do not mind when people are emotional when addressing pain as long as the problem is addressed.
Expectations of politeness from an individual being hurt feels too rooted in “nicety” politics that oppressors in racism and sexism use for control. Being direct and not sugar-coating a repeated boundary violation feels acceptable as long as it’s not taken too far (insults, threats, etc). Sometimes bluntness is in order when hints and asks all along aren’t landing… clarity is needed. To spell out the issue succinctly may sting a bit as some folks are too in their own heads to notice the two-way street of a relationship’s breakdown. When requests of responsibility or better treatment are ignored over time as a pattern AND claims to do better are made BUT the messy conduct or downright inconsideration keeps repeating itself…
It’s clearly a “them” issue. Ball is in your court.
Lately people are assuming my capacity is what it used to be EVEN THOUGH I AM REPEATING IT IS NOT.
And I am already hard on myself for not being able to maintain my life as it is (subject for Sagittarius New Moon to come). Friends, family, co-workers keep dismissing the multiple stressful situations I’ve made clear are a barrier to my functioning AND a havoc on my mental health right now yet they center themselves like what I’m going thru hasn’t been said again and again. In reality I CAN NOT BE BOTHERED. Like, truly, I can’t. I will break if these people keep bothering me with their want of access to my business’ visibility, to get on my work schedule, to ask me to help them regulate their own emotions. Very few people have helped me do the same.
Meanwhile I’m drowning in legal paperwork, sick family, excessive debt and a mountain of catch-up.
Running after perceived (or in some cases very real) slights aren’t aligned with my purpose or priorities yet I’ve snapped a few times, feeling more a failure.
At the same time, anyone worth a shit would not push me to the edge. In a way, I am grateful that I’m over-extended and I can not chase for answers. Because even if the chase isn’t aggressive, begging for info, a seek of justice, others are not evolved enough to even truly know their affect on the World around them… and I’m not taking on the labor right now to be a teacher. There is a limit to when a want for repair is indeed just playing out an old childhood wound. Thus I sit in Scorpio energy with reverence. I remember she never chases, instead attracts. I make note of who is showing up and who is not, who is being caring and who is a clown, and my access will change accordingly. Walking away from a situation that does not improve IS divine.
Disengage, go back in your cave and lock in, unless it is really necessary to stab a bitch.
WHAT: Scorpio New Moon
WHEN: Thursday November 20th, 2025 1:46 AM EST
THEME: If You Kick a Mythic Beast When it is Down, Goddess Help You When it Gets Up Again ;)
Scorpio Season itself is immersion, a deep dive into the murky waters of the Psyche tho hopefully NOT getting stuck in a drain pipe of the Past. The pitfall of Scorpio is obsessiveness yet if anyone can shadow work their way into healing (and make it avant-garde while at it), it’s Fixed Water. As we move into the latter half of Mercury Retrograde and the New Moon will share shocks at the end of her Season, Scorpio Mercury takes over the backspin AND Scorpio Venus will unearth hidden truths. It’s difficult to deconstruct programming from lovers, bosses, colleagues and all ill-indications in its wake when we are pigeon-holed into roles for another’s use but the reciprocity isn’t there.
In the Wood Snake Year of 2025, keeping low to the ground, appreciating the roots, making a burrow in the Earth has felt personally safer for me…
But there is also a stagnation related to the Virgo South Node that I’ve had to be careful of (especially as a Virgo Moon myself). Moments of familiarity represented foundation but were proven to be a cesspool of stale non-exchange; I grew resentment within traps of distraction to engage in one-sided repair. Yes, this effort made sense 2 years ago with my wife; absolutely makes 0 sense today as I’m rebuilding my life. No attune to attend to health of a union, I found myself taking on “group projects” all by myself. I had to have a hard talk with my people-pleasing, my Libra Mars wish for peace, the ways in which I betray myself. I arose from Autumn Eclipse Season a new person, shedding my old skin BUT I’m still adjusting how, when and where she will express and also enforce boundaries…
Better knowing when to walk away after less than too many red flags.
Just a few months until we wrap up the hermit-y Wood Snake and enter the Year of the Fire Horse which I can’t help but associate with Sagittarius. The scrambled sensationalism that accompanies the Scorpio New Moon at the very tail-end of her sharp-stinging Season soon after brings the flip-flop Mercury Retrograde and the Seasons of Scorpio and Sagittarius. We’ve been dealing with duo dynamics of very different approaches and reactions… tho I both to have a large breadth of reactionary wilds. While we’re in for a great weekend of Grand Water Trines, doing the good work to smooth over situational snafus, some of the involved planets are also Retrograde. A bit of a Death-Rebirth cycle in these whirlpools but if we can be observational, this last week of Scorpio Season will re-orient us for better communication of boundaries and to lock-in with what-matters-most tasks.
Relationship dynamics ALWAYS come into play for Mercury Retrograde…
There is so much nitty-gritty that should not be side-lined just because romantic rifes are more passionate. Mercury Scorpio is shrewd but sexy: an erotic dive into the Shadow Side of taboo topics and a sharp smarts for business with emphasis on what needs to be on the chopping block. Moving into Mercury Rx in Scorpio for Sag SZN will be more positive tho rehashing hurts for a moment. Attuning to Mercury Rx to review how expectations vs disappointment have overstayed their welcome and onward how we can communicate what we want clearly is key. Tho it feels like at this time all the Retrogrades are a dark cloud over relational outcomes, the Astrology asks us to take a serious step in getting unstuck from our own lore of being let down all while allowing the idea that other people ARE messy.
We have to work in reality and walk away from lack of repair. Those are the parameters that take us on better paths.
Scorpio New Moon & Mercury Rx (Part II):
As Mercury Sagittarius has been backspin since 11/9, the philosophical but passionate Sign in Rx has been flirting both with the Future and seeing the World from a birds-eye view with many perspectives AND likely running mouths amuck. The few days of backspin with Mercury Sag during Scorpio Season right after the Taurus Full Moon have been intense to say the least. Slow down and speak with intention if possible.
On 11/18 Scorpio Sun trines Saturn Rx in Pisces AND Mercury Rx in Sag sextiles Pluto in Aquarius. Ask and ye shall receive… maybe. But you never know if you do not try! Just make sure you really want what you wish for. The Sag-Aqua aspect is ripe for research and can boost the Water Trine to stay as informed as possible for the New Moon after.
Switching back to Mercury Scorpio on 11/18-19 before the Scorpio New Moon pulls our processes back to go inward. Visionary vivacity to both will explore the reality check of emotional reserves vs. the big ideas that seem great in theory but need a lot of work-around on paper.
On 11/19, Scorpio Sun opposes Uranus in Taurus for a capricious chaos-cosmos dance that keeps us on our toes, perhaps more like a cursed cabaret (queue The Red Shoes - above is a favorite interpretation by a favorite artist). This manic moment can be a thrilling tango into life’s richness and an aid into embodying the resilience and forbearance required to steer our way through the labyrinth of energy-vampire encounters that may await for the last few months of Uranus in Taurus (hopefully no Minotaurs or Medusas in our path)!
Additionally on 11/19, Scorpio Sun trines Neptune Rx in Pisces adding a dreamy boost to the ADHD-intensity of the above opposition. Fantastical longings may be worthy of a relish providing inspo or deadly distraction. If your ducks are not in a row, this space reads “reset” or it can put us in the procrastination hot-seat of a major spiral.
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